Dad to Dads Podcast
Inspiring fathers to become better dads while educating society on the importance of fathers being actively involved in the lives of their children. Topics include: fatherhood, parenting, divorce, co-parenting, sports, relationships, mental & physical health as well as exposing the inequities of how custody is determined by the court system.
Dad to Dads Podcast
Episode #7 Part 2 with Kenny Joyner, Founder and CEO of Boys With a Purpose
Episode 7 is the second of a two part interview with Kenny Joyner. Kenny is the CEO & Founder of Boys with a Purpose - featured on The Steve Harvey Show, as well as a Professional Speaker and author of Without A Father, From Fear to Faith - which I highly recommend.
Boys With a Purpose is a phenomenal program and nonprofit whose mission is to
inspire, influence and empower young men to focus on their life’s purpose, while imparting wisdom that will allow them to be productive and effective citizens in their communities and in the world.
Listen as we learn further about the lives that are being changed as well as the story of his organization being featured on The Steve Harvey Show, along with what Steve Harvey is really like when the cameras are off.
Kenny is doing amazing things in these young men’s lives, he is a Change Maker.
Kenny’s wisdom and inspiration for fathers as well as all parents provides much needed guidance for raising children in today’s world.
Kenny is one of my favorite people - he’s a man’s man with a servant’s heart, wanting to do everything he can to improve the next generation.
I’ve said it before, but I hope everyone is blessed to cross paths with someone like Kenny at least once in their life.
By the way - his book, Without A Father, From Fear to Faith, is available on Amazon and I HIGHLY recommend it.
Robert Poirier:
Hey everyone and welcome back to dad to dad's podcast. And I have Kenny joiner that is with me again for part two of our conversation. Kenny welcome.
Kenny Joyner:
Thank you man. Thank you for having me. I so appreciate it. Great to be back with you.
Robert Poirier:
Man, I'm glad you're here. And I tell you what, for all those listening, if you did not hear part one, go back, listen to it. We talk about his book, Without a Father from Fear to Faith. And I highly recommend two things. One, you listen to the episode, and two, that you buy the book. But the reason why we broke this down into two is you have so much going on. And really, the second part is why I originally reached out to you. And it was to talk about an organization that you started boys with a purpose. And I would love to hear more from you on that. Um, you know, and if you could just kind of dive into it, like what is it? How did it get started? What is your goal? You know, it's boys with a purpose. What is your purpose behind it?
Kenny Joyner:
My purpose is to build strong young men, right? And that's really what's been my goal from day one. I've been mentoring now over 25 years. And so just seeing the importance of mentoring and coaching and helping, especially our young men, it's just been a harsh desire for mine. And so in 2016, when I moved here to Charleston and I was teaching. I saw that our boys needed something. They needed more guidance beyond the academics, right? They needed something to help deal with the social emotional pieces that they were dealing with outside of school, which were finding their way into the classroom. And so I just wanted to start as, you know, a small group and just kind of meet with them and talk a little bit about manners and etiquette. And so that was our initial. you know, stance that we wanted to do. And so we would.
Robert Poirier:
So where is this? And did you start through a school? And if you don't mind, what school is it?
Kenny Joyner:
Sure.
Robert Poirier:
How did you get this group together? I know you just didn't start seeing young men and said, hey, come with me, come with me.
Kenny Joyner:
Right.
Robert Poirier:
I mean, tell me more.
Kenny Joyner:
Yeah. So when I was a teacher at Memminger Elementary School in Charleston, South Carolina, 2016 is when we started. We would just simply, you know, meet with our young men during my lunch period, right, myself and another gentleman, just trying to coach them up again, just, you know, really give them some, you know, self-esteem and really try to, you know, instilling them a value system of really just being confident in who you are, but then also learning how to be respectful and how to be real gentlemen. And so we would dress them up, you know, just every Wednesday at that time, take a little picture, put it up on Facebook, you know, just to kind of give them a shout out and lo and behold, got wind to Mr. Steve Harvey. And so...
Robert Poirier:
I want to go into that and
Kenny Joyner:
Yeah.
Robert Poirier:
let's hold off just a minute, but I do want
Kenny Joyner:
role.
Robert Poirier:
to go into everything about Steve Harvey.
Kenny Joyner:
Got it.
Robert Poirier:
Well, you know what? Go ahead. Let's hear about it. Go ahead.
Kenny Joyner:
Well, again, that was a big piece and we got the call and.
Robert Poirier:
Was that early on or was that after you guys had been established for a while?
Kenny Joyner:
No, that was early on. We started January of 2016. We got the call in March of 20.
Robert Poirier:
How did he find out about you guys?
Kenny Joyner:
He saw us on Facebook. He saw us on Facebook. It was crazy. Somebody saw us on Facebook. And and so we got invited out. We had an opportunity to bring five boys with us and flew to Chicago. The turnaround was quick, filmed the show and just had a phenomenal time. And it was truly life changing, not only obviously for the boys, but also for myself. And I didn't realize for me personally how impactful it would be. I knew I wanted to do the work. I was doing the work. I knew I loved doing it. But when we were there... He was just so gracious. He was just so kind, especially to these young boys and just allowing them to go into the electronic room to kind of see how live TV was made. They fed us, they really took really good care of us. And that kind of calmed them down. Every boy got a haircut on the set from Steve's personal
Robert Poirier:
Oh, that's
Kenny Joyner:
barber.
Robert Poirier:
cool.
Kenny Joyner:
I got my haircut as well. And
Robert Poirier:
Wait,
Kenny Joyner:
so...
Robert Poirier:
why does he have a barber?
Kenny Joyner:
I know, right? Right. And so, yeah. And so, but yeah, it was just a really great piece. And then when we did the show, one of the things he said is that, you know, this is gonna keep going. And these five boys are gonna infect five more and five more and five more. And, you know, that just got me to thinking like, man, hey, we do, we do have to do more. And then when we came back, The buzz was so big that I said, man, we got to do more. And so that's when the launch of the after school program just started. And so it was
Robert Poirier:
I
Kenny Joyner:
just.
Robert Poirier:
had no idea. I thought you were established and then he found out about it. I didn't realize he played such a huge part in that.
Kenny Joyner:
Now, he put us really, that put us on the map, got us going, got me more interested. We started the official nonprofit. And then from there, man, we've just really been just trying to again instill and do some great things for these young people. And then, in addition to that, he gave us a hundred tickets to go to Carowinds. theme park that's located right there in North Carolina. And we took a busload of parents and students there. And it was just,
Robert Poirier:
He just donated that.
Kenny Joyner:
yeah, he's just the kind of person he is. You know what I'm saying? And so.
Robert Poirier:
So a couple things. One, um, I saw it online.
Kenny Joyner:
Mm-hmm.
Robert Poirier:
Is that on your page? Do you have it on your page? Um,
Kenny Joyner:
No,
Robert Poirier:
get
Kenny Joyner:
we don't
Robert Poirier:
like
Kenny Joyner:
have
Robert Poirier:
the
Kenny Joyner:
that.
Robert Poirier:
clip of it.
Kenny Joyner:
We don't have that clip on our page. We used to, but over the years we've.
Robert Poirier:
You can go and find that for anybody listening. You can go and find that. Uh, you can go Steve Harvey show. And actually the way I found it was gentlemen's club, which was used to be the name of, of, uh, your organization. And, uh, you change that. It was interesting when I typed in Steve Harvey, gentlemen's club, some of the things that came up. Uh,
Kenny Joyner:
Thank
Robert Poirier:
and I know
Kenny Joyner:
you.
Robert Poirier:
you guys had a name change there, which probably for
Kenny Joyner:
Yeah.
Robert Poirier:
a good reason, but,
Kenny Joyner:
Yeah.
Robert Poirier:
uh, I highly recommend. Everybody's seeing that it's cute and it's really good. I was pleased to see that. I wanna, Steve Harvey, like, what is he? Is he really just as genuine, just as nice and humble of a man as he seems? I mean, cause man, everything I see about him, read about him, I mean, I know he had very humble beginnings, hard start, homeless, like living in his car, just. What is he like? I mean, you talked about how he was with the kids. I mean, that was legit. I mean, that was real. He wasn't show.
Kenny Joyner:
Yeah, that was 100% legit. And I think you can recognize if somebody's kind of putting on or whatever the case may be. And he was 100% legit with us when we were there. He was 100% with the kids. They remember that. experience. And yeah, because I think he came from such humble beginnings, you know, he said, man, I never want to go back there again, you know. And so that's why I'm working here, I'm doing here, I'm doing this. I think he had four or five shows at that time, that he was doing, because he had a goal and a mission just to do more in his life. And obviously he's evolved and continues to do great things. but he was always that genuine person that I saw that day, and then we got an opportunity to meet. He would, you know, even before we started shooting, he went to the crowd and just, you know, started speaking to everybody and talking with everybody, and just, he's just a genuine person. And so, and that gives obviously, you know, hope to a lot of us because, you know, we want to believe that our goals and our dreams true as well. And so it's just been a great honor for me to just see his whole life evolve from that time that we've met until now, you know. And so I'm just, it was just a great experience for all of us and I think all of our lives
Robert Poirier:
What
Kenny Joyner:
were
Robert Poirier:
a blessing.
Kenny Joyner:
changed. Yeah, it just was. It was a true blessing. It was.
Robert Poirier:
I mean, what a blessing. I'm so happy to hear that about him. And you know, he's somebody that I follow and what a wise person. And I'm so happy to hear that he's so genuine. He seemed like he was. You never know though. Um,
Kenny Joyner:
Yeah,
Robert Poirier:
but he's
Kenny Joyner:
yeah,
Robert Poirier:
sort,
Kenny Joyner:
yeah.
Robert Poirier:
you just don't. Um, but he seemed like he was, and I'm so happy to hear that. And he seems like, yeah, he's just such a big heart and I'm glad you were there and you can confirm it and, uh, just the impact that he had on, on you guys as well. But yeah, if anybody wants to see that, I would highly recommend just Google or whatever search engine you use, type in Steve Harvey Show and Gentleman's Club and it will come up. And it's probably about five minutes, but it's a great watch.
Kenny Joyner:
Yeah.
Robert Poirier:
All right, so you started at the elementary school. Okay, so, okay, you come back, your, I imagine your, You know, you said it blew up. I'm sure all the local regional news picked it up. And all of a sudden it's like, Whoa, okay. We've got something real here. So where did you, where did you go from there? Like, how did you start getting these young men? Do you select them? Do they come to you? Do they have require their requirements or you know, what, what is it?
Kenny Joyner:
Initially we did, we just accepted everybody, really,
Robert Poirier:
Yeah.
Kenny Joyner:
because we saw the need in our school specifically for the guidance for these young men. And so we probably had about, man, there have been times when we had like 30 or 40 come into my classroom to meet for that.
Robert Poirier:
Is this after school before school?
Kenny Joyner:
Well sometimes during school, right?
Robert Poirier:
Okay.
Kenny Joyner:
Initially during school. And then once we got the space from the College of Charleston, to be able to do it after school is when we started doing that after school piece. But during school, we would meet with them like 30 minutes, my principal would allow that, take my lunch period or whatever the case may be. And it was just a great thing at that time, but we knew we had to do more, we had to get more organized and different things. And then donations started coming in. And that's when we really- realized like, man, okay, people are donating suits and ties. And we had companies coming out to donate four or 500 ties to the boys and people were, yeah. So then all of that, you know, we had to come up with a website and just, you know, all of the things that go with the nonprofit and to be able to do that. And so, and so from there, that's when, you know we just really feel like, okay, let's start. really kind of, you know, narrowing it down and just seeing. So we started doing third through fifth grade, and I was
Robert Poirier:
Okay.
Kenny Joyner:
teaching fifth grade at the time. And so that was a big piece. And then over the years from 2016, some of those fifth graders, obviously would move on to middle school, but they would want to come back. And so that's what we've seen a lot of, you know, we've seen a lot of our middle school and even now some of our high school kids come back. And those, what's great is, those five young men who went on the show, one of them was graduating this year and the other four will graduate next year. So that's just a big,
Robert Poirier:
That's cool.
Kenny Joyner:
yeah, I'm looking forward to that. So, yeah.
Robert Poirier:
So... I'm sorry, I sound like I was getting
Kenny Joyner:
You lost
Robert Poirier:
echo
Kenny Joyner:
count?
Robert Poirier:
there for a minute. Alright, so with these with these young men that you have, is there Are they fatherless or do they have a dad in their life or what, you know, kind of give me the background maybe of the school is a school, you know, is it kind of an impoverished area? Is it, you know, tell me more about that.
Kenny Joyner:
And when we first started at the school, the school was Title I, which obviously is 100% free and reduced lunch.
Robert Poirier:
Right.
Kenny Joyner:
A lot of the kids did come from fatherless homes, but some had their fathers, right? And that's a myth that we want to kind of debunk, that every kid in our program doesn't have a father. No, sometimes that is there, but maybe he's not able to be there, you know, as consistent or as often as we can, and we just want to help. That's the key. It's not just about kids who don't have fathers. We want to continue to help them develop things over time that maybe fathers who have to work, right, can't do in that
Robert Poirier:
Right.
Kenny Joyner:
moment. And that's really what we wanted to do, just help in the community and making sure that no kid has the gap where, hey, he can't be in the program or whether he has a father or doesn't have a father. He can't participate, right? We wanted to make sure that because character How to treat people how to carry yourself as a young man? Those are things that have to be taught on a daily basis, right? and sometimes parents have the time and sometimes they don't and And we were doing it juggling our own personal lives. I'm married. I got a daughter
Robert Poirier:
Right.
Kenny Joyner:
And so it was it was difficult at the time. But as I tell everybody It's a difference when you have something that you want to do and something that you have to do. This is a
Robert Poirier:
Yeah.
Kenny Joyner:
call for me. I have to do this because of where I come from and how I was raised and different things that happened to me. I've been called to do this work. I know that beyond a shadow of a doubt. And again, seven years I've been doing it. I don't get a salary. But it is a call for me and I've seen the benefit. that has had on so many young men's lives and so many families lives. I ran into a family just yesterday, you know, and just to see their young man come through our program and how well he's doing now and mom is doing well and she's a homeowner now and just all of these things that you see, you know, that come about and so once we really put our mind to say, hey, this is what we're going to do. Then everything, you know, everybody started coming, man. Boeing, you know, started reaching out and they would come in and do robotics and different things with our boys.
Robert Poirier:
Oh wow.
Kenny Joyner:
So that was a big piece as well. And so we brought in College of Charleston basketball team and College of Charleston soccer team and just have students to be able to talk. And the beauty of it is that we're on a college campus.
Robert Poirier:
Okay.
Kenny Joyner:
And some of these kids have never. been on a college campus, but some of them have never had people in their families go to college. And so they get to be on a college campus, they get to interact with college students, and they get to see that possibility. And guess what? You can go here too. You know? And that's what I love.
Robert Poirier:
You know, and going back to my question about are they fatherless or not, um, you know, I think back to my boys and I mean, I'm, I'm involved in their lives, but I also realized that I can take them so far and you know, they need other men around them too. And whether that's a coach, whoever that may be, uh, you know, just to be that well rounded man. And, uh, man, I think it's, I think it's wonderful what you're doing. What I want to hear though. So I know a little bit more, but kind of explain. I noticed that, um, when they were on the Steve Harvey show and some of the research I've said, man, those, those, those boys are dressed up, they're looking sharp. And so tell me about that and the eye contact and. You know, so I'm, I'm a new young man that's going in there. What should I expect or what is your goal for? I know you've kind of given a broad goal, but dig in like just kind of your every day, what you want to see out of them.
Kenny Joyner:
Well, if you're a new young man coming to our program, you know, one of the first things we're gonna say and I'm gonna tell you is that... You're going to be different when you leave here than when you came. You're ready to go through a transformation, right? Which means you're going to change. You're going to change the way you think. You're going to change the way you walk, the way you talk, the way you feel about yourself. Right. And that transformation takes time. Right. And one of the things you're going to see is you're going to see intentionality when it comes to everything we do. Even when I greet you, right. It's going to be intentionality.
Robert Poirier:
Right.
Kenny Joyner:
How to shake a man's hand. I was a manager at UPS for 16 years. years and I had to do a lot of interviewing and you'd be surprised at the people that would walk in and couldn't give me eye contact and couldn't shake my hand with a firm handshake because back in the day that was it.
Robert Poirier:
Yeah.
Kenny Joyner:
A handshake,
Robert Poirier:
Oh, absolutely.
Kenny Joyner:
that was all we had. That was your word, right? That was your contract. And if you couldn't shake a man's hand and look him in the eye and say, hey, I'm on pay or you can count on me or I'm going to be here, right? I'm dependable, right? Then people didn't want to deal with you. And so I think we've gotten away from that. But we teach that intentionally so that young men can feel confident, not only in themselves, but in who they engage. Because men recognize men and we know when men are trying to know, kind of get over on us or whatever the case
Robert Poirier:
Right.
Kenny Joyner:
may be. But we also know, you know, like my grandfather who was a man's man, right? It was no doubt about who he was. It was no doubt about his character. And it was no doubt about what he if he said he was going to do something that he was going to do it. Right. And so we take them through that whole piece of that in that initial engagement. But then we also talk about bringing excellence to everything we do. Right. And that comes with how we. right and that's that's that look good feel good do good model that we adopted you know from from the start because when you look good you do feel good and when you feel good you want to do good and so that's what we want we don't want them you know in school fighting we don't want them acting out we want them to be able to control and and and deal with their emotion right because I was angry when I was young as well but how do I deal with that and how to I develop myself in such a way that I can now learn how to express myself as a young man. And so those are the things that we take them through specifically. We do, you know, public speaking. That's a big piece of what we do. They're actually working on that now. Teaching kids how to present themselves and speak up for themselves, have their own voice, not to be timid, not to be, you know, shy in a sense. of who you are, right? You might have some shy experiences, but never be shy about yourself, about who you are. Have that voice, be able to speak up and say, my name is, and then be able to do that with confidence. And so public speaking is a big part of what we do. This year we're doing something different in that you've got to, in a sense, argue and tell me why you deserve to not only get your award for our program, Why do you deserve to go to the next grade? So if you're in fifth grade and you're...
Robert Poirier:
So they've got to do that in front of you in a room or how do they
Kenny Joyner:
They do
Robert Poirier:
like?
Kenny Joyner:
that. They're going to do that in front of me. Yeah, they're going to do it in front of their peers as well. All right.
Robert Poirier:
So
Kenny Joyner:
So you're
Robert Poirier:
where
Kenny Joyner:
going to
Robert Poirier:
are you? Are you like in a little classroom or where are you?
Kenny Joyner:
Yeah, we're going to be in a classroom. But sometimes I take them to an actual lecture hall, and
Robert Poirier:
Ha ha ha.
Kenny Joyner:
we actually just posted a little bit about that. And you can see them up on the lecture hall, stay in front, actually presenting themselves, because that's where the confidence is developed. And this week we're talking about confidence. Because somebody asked me, hey, Mr. Jonah, how do you get confident? And we talked about that, right? You don't get confidence, you earn it. and you earn it through your action. You just don't wake up and be like, oh, I'm confident. You earn confidence through action. And so just teaching that, right? Because that was a question I had when I was younger. How
Robert Poirier:
Yeah.
Kenny Joyner:
do I get confident? No, you don't just get confident, you earn it. And if you really want it, you're gonna have to do something specifically on a day-to-day basis to get confident. You wanna get better as a reader, you wanna get better in math, you wanna get better in handling your right, which we talk a lot about,
Robert Poirier:
Yeah.
Kenny Joyner:
you earn it. How? By doing something every single day. And so we just take them... Yeah, go ahead.
Robert Poirier:
So, this is pretty amazing. So you have them argue or maybe not debate, but argue or state their case as to why they should move to the next grade and why they should advance in your program.
Kenny Joyner:
Absolutely. You
Robert Poirier:
Wow.
Kenny Joyner:
have to be able to. to stand up for yourself in defense to say, hey, I deserve to go to the sixth grade because when we first started, I was getting a C in math and I've worked hard, I've gone through tutoring and I've developed a skillset now that has me at a 92 in math. And so I deserve because I put the work in, right? As a young man, if you can talk to me and give me that, then now... You know what you're right you do because you put the work in but you need to be able to articulate that in such a way that It's one it's believable, but two you're confident in
Robert Poirier:
Yeah,
Kenny Joyner:
it. Yeah
Robert Poirier:
that's so cool. That is so cool. So how many days a week is this program?
Kenny Joyner:
It's three days a week. We've been doing Wednesday, Thursday, Friday for the last seven years. This year we've had to change up a few days just because of my schedule,
Robert Poirier:
Right.
Kenny Joyner:
but normally it's Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, three days a week. We go from three to six. And in that time period, which is a great piece, is that we're focused, one, on academics, two, we're going to do some type of core character lesson, right? And then three, we're going to just check in with them to see what it is they are struggling with and what it is they need help with. on any level, which I think schools have to do more, right? When kids come into the classroom, we just want to teach them. But we've got to take some time out to say, hey, what do you need, right? We can't do school like we've been doing it for the last hundred years. We've got to switch it up because things have changed, right? Everything in education has changed except for the way we do education. It's come in,
Robert Poirier:
True.
Kenny Joyner:
get a book, stand up, you regurgitated back to me, I test you to see if you know what I taught you. We gotta stop, we gotta mix it up. And in Boys With A Purpose, we mix it up in the sense of we give the kids the voice. We give
Robert Poirier:
Yeah.
Kenny Joyner:
our young men the voice to be able to say, hey, this is how I learn math, and it's okay for me to learn it this way. This is how I developed my reading skill. And it's okay for me to learn it this way. I'm not trying to put them in any kind of box. In fact, I want them to think outside of the box and be outside of the box as much as possible because that's when they can become their authentic selves, their unique selves and the best version of themselves.
Robert Poirier:
So this has been going on for about seven years.
Kenny Joyner:
Yeah.
Robert Poirier:
You talked about your first class, how some of them are graduating now. I met and you've kind of touched on some of the success stories, but I would love to hear more. Are there other success stories or just seeing the kids that maybe it was a kid who got in fights a lot and all of a sudden he's very humble or very... uh, you know, more at peace within himself. Um, have you seen a good bit of that with these? I
Kenny Joyner:
Oh
Robert Poirier:
imagine
Kenny Joyner:
yeah,
Robert Poirier:
so.
Kenny Joyner:
absolutely. Yeah, absolutely. We've seen so many success stories. And really, let me be honest, that's what keeps me going. That's what keeps me going. Running a nonprofit is hard work, especially when you're in the trenches every day and you're feeling the emotion of these kids. You're seeing when they don't have lights or when they don't have food. You're seeing the emotion of if they're getting in trouble in school and you know why or what's happening on the outside. You're seeing if... parents are divorcing and there's a split and there's a battle between the kid and different things. You're seeing the effect on them. So it's not just we're teaching character and we're going through academics. I see every single day the lives that these young men are in and that wears on you. And so, but yeah, the success is that we had a young man, I won't use his name, but we had a young man in sixth grade. right after, you know, the first year after he left us, it was in sixth grade, and just got involved in the wrong crowd, got involved in the wrong situation, and ended up getting expelled, right? And I went to the expulsion hearing with him, and I told him, I said, hey, this is gonna be a part of your journey, right? One day you're gonna be before people, and you're gonna tell them that you were expelled, but you got back on track, and you've had success. And he was top of his eighth grade class last year. He's in ninth grade now. And a beyond a role, just really doing some great things with his life. And that for me, because he was, if I would have had a son, it would have been him. And that's really what he was, he's so dear to my heart.
Robert Poirier:
Man.
Kenny Joyner:
But... But to see him turn around, to see him be successful, he's gone to a few NBA games with us this year and come back to actually speak to the next generation and just tell his story. He'll be at our awards ceremony this year as well. That's just one of the many success stories because I want them to understand that it's not where you start.
Robert Poirier:
Yeah.
Kenny Joyner:
It's how you finish,
Robert Poirier:
Yeah.
Kenny Joyner:
right? And that even because we think when a kid gets in trouble, when a kid is doing things that, you know, whether they're acting out or whatever the case may be, we think that, you know, that's the time to just, you know, like, hey, man, it's nothing more I can do, you know,
Robert Poirier:
Right.
Kenny Joyner:
but boys with a purpose, those are the kids we want. The kids that people want to throw away, the young men that people think that, you know, it's time to give up on this person. Let me move on to put my efforts in somebody else. Those are the kids that we think we want the most. The kids that people don't deem have value, that they don't think they're ever going to be anything because that is what people thought about me. Right. I want those kids because I know we have what it takes to flip the switch for them, to turn it on. to say, man, you've got more value than you think. Regardless of what people are saying, you can be something great. And that's all kids ever need. They just need one light, one yes,
Robert Poirier:
Yeah, yeah.
Kenny Joyner:
right? That's
Robert Poirier:
We
Kenny Joyner:
it.
Robert Poirier:
all make mistakes, we all do.
Kenny Joyner:
That's it.
Robert Poirier:
Man, these young men are so lucky to have you. I know you're
Kenny Joyner:
out.
Robert Poirier:
lucky to have them, but they are
Kenny Joyner:
Yeah.
Robert Poirier:
so fortunate to have you in their lives. I mean, they really are. And just as a mentor, as a guide, so lucky, I thank you. I mean, I really do.
Kenny Joyner:
Well, thank you. I appreciate it, man. I just, I wanna always try to give back and pour out. Right, that's really what, you never wanna hoard. the gift you have.
Robert Poirier:
Yeah.
Kenny Joyner:
And I've got a gift to be able to reach the lost, to reach young men who have closed their hearts up, have closed their minds up to possibility. I've been given a gift to be able to tap into that and inspire and motivate. And I just wanna give it away as much as I possibly can to save a life. And I said coming into this year, if we could just save one, right? I didn't know how many we were gonna have, but if we could just save one, this year would be worth it. And so we've got 12 that are rolling with us now and more are gonna be coming back and coming to the awards ceremony in May. But yeah, it's just really going to be, I just want to continue to do my part. when it comes to some of the things that are happening, in this world, a lot of people on the sidelines talking about what we should do, could do,
Robert Poirier:
Right,
Kenny Joyner:
ought to do,
Robert Poirier:
should
Kenny Joyner:
you know,
Robert Poirier:
have done everything
Kenny Joyner:
yeah,
Robert Poirier:
else,
Kenny Joyner:
all
Robert Poirier:
yeah.
Kenny Joyner:
of that, you know, and so for me, I've always wanted to be in the game, right?
Robert Poirier:
That's
Kenny Joyner:
I want
Robert Poirier:
so
Kenny Joyner:
to be it.
Robert Poirier:
inspiring. I mean, it really is. And I think. Again, it's kind of goes back to earlier conversation of their interview. I mean, we as men, we need to stand up. I mean, look, this is our cry we need we need to do it with it's our time we need to stand up and take a part in our own house, and our own children. And then wherever else we can help. I mean, you're you're definitely testament to that. You know, we have time whether it's, you know, being that one other, you know, to a neighborhood kid, whoever it can be, we need, we need to do that. We need to give back and man, guys like you that have that wisdom, that haven't had things easy, that have seen a lot, that have had their shares of nightmares in their lives and that can, you know, go to these kids and, and just be, Hey, I know what you're going through. You know, they like, they, they, I see that with my own boys to with, with different challenges they have and like, Hey, I know what you're experiencing. and to be on their level and to really have that empathy. I think that's, man, that's awesome, Kenny. I mean, it really is. So. I, this might not matter that much, but man, these kids, like I kind of talked about, they're dressed up. You've got them in ties. Some with bow ties is that every day is that all three times they've got to, they've got to air three times during a week. They wear that when they meet with you, or is it just on Fridays? Is it all the time? And you kind
Kenny Joyner:
No.
Robert Poirier:
of alluded to it, but how do they, cause I imagine some of these kids can't afford to dress dressed up. And look, when I saw pictures of them, like, it's not like they're wearing something that their older brother wore that's too big for them or something they've been wearing for the last two years. I mean everything fits. I mean they're looking sharp.
Kenny Joyner:
We make sure that man and so what's been great is,
Robert Poirier:
And how do they respond to that? I don't want to dress
Kenny Joyner:
well,
Robert Poirier:
up.
Kenny Joyner:
no, they love it. And that's one of the things. So recently we just had a big haircut drive where we gave away free haircuts to the whole community. I brought in probably like nine barbers. They cut everybody's hair for free, talked about the profession of barbering and how it originated and everything. And all of our boys got haircuts, right? And so that was just a big thing. The community came out. And so that's one of the things that are part of that look good, feel good, do good. And so when they get to dress up and we're getting ready to take them now. to get measured for their suit. Somebody has stepped up and said, hey, I wanna donate all 12 suits this year for the boys. And so when you go in, and again, this is just me using everything as a lesson, you know, it's one thing to pick a suit off the rack,
Robert Poirier:
Right.
Kenny Joyner:
right? But there's another thing when you get a suit made for you. And so I equate that with your purpose. Your purpose is made for you. it fits you, right? If I put a suit on the rack, there might be some things, I might have to take it here, take it in here or there, but then I show them, hey, this is a suit that's been made for me. What do you notice about
Robert Poirier:
Wow.
Kenny Joyner:
it? And then I take the jacket off, and then I put it on another young man, right? And obviously the jacket is big on him. And I say the same thing, like, look, this jacket doesn't fit him now, but eventually, if he stays consistent, stays focused, he'll grow into his purpose. And that's one of the things that when they get their suit made for them, and there's something, I don't care who you are, what man you are, there's something about when it's time to dress up.
Robert Poirier:
Yep.
Kenny Joyner:
I'm trying to
Robert Poirier:
Yep.
Kenny Joyner:
tell you. There's something about that. You got a nice haircut, you got a brand new suit to put on, it just changes you, right? Because you know you're gonna be looking good, looking sharp. And that does something not only to you, but it does something to the people who see you, right?
Robert Poirier:
I love
Kenny Joyner:
They're
Robert Poirier:
it.
Kenny Joyner:
like.
Robert Poirier:
So no baggy pants or shorts hanging low, no hoodies with the hood on. It's like, uh, we're not having any of that.
Kenny Joyner:
Now we don't do any of that because again we always want to connect with who we are, right? and wearing our pants sagging, wearing a hood, and they have hoods, but I'm saying when we're together and you're in a classroom, you don't need your hood on, right? When we go places, you don't need your hood on, right? But let me say this, I understand why our young men wear hoods,
Robert Poirier:
Yeah,
Kenny Joyner:
right?
Robert Poirier:
yeah,
Kenny Joyner:
I've had
Robert Poirier:
yeah,
Kenny Joyner:
several
Robert Poirier:
I do.
Kenny Joyner:
talks with them, but they know that that's not a true representation And every day here what we talk what we always say who are we trying to be the best version of me? That's it. And so I'll just ask him is this the best version of you? No, sir. It's not. Let me take my hood off right, so
Robert Poirier:
So is it yes sir, no sir, it's the whole nine yards.
Kenny Joyner:
the
Robert Poirier:
You're
Kenny Joyner:
whole
Robert Poirier:
teaching
Kenny Joyner:
year.
Robert Poirier:
them everything.
Kenny Joyner:
It's the whole nine yards. I believe
Robert Poirier:
Wow.
Kenny Joyner:
that when I was younger, those are the things that, uh, that were instilled in me early and often. And I didn't deviate from that. Right. Just
Robert Poirier:
That makes
Kenny Joyner:
even
Robert Poirier:
such
Kenny Joyner:
today,
Robert Poirier:
a difference too.
Kenny Joyner:
I can't call an older woman by her first name. Like that
Robert Poirier:
Right.
Kenny Joyner:
just, yeah, you just don't do that, right? So those are the things that have been instilled in me. And those are the things that not only show respect for other people, but they show respect for yourself. That's the core
Robert Poirier:
Yeah, oh, absolutely.
Kenny Joyner:
piece. Yeah, that's the core pieces. So first, who do you wanna show respect for? You wanna show respect for yourself. Then you want to show respect for others. Then you want to make sure you show respect for those who are older than you. And you definitely want to show respect for women, 100%. And we teach a lesson on each piece of that because it's not enough just to say that now I need you to understand why and then I need you to actually put it into practice. So, yeah, so it's just been a great piece for us. Etiquette, we talk about they go to the restaurant, fancy and dressed up.
Robert Poirier:
I was gonna ask you, yeah?
Kenny Joyner:
Yeah, they get that experience, man. And I didn't get that experience when I was younger, but here's what I'm always after. I'm always after life-changing experiences. things that are gonna impact you, things you're gonna remember, things that you're gonna be like, wow, we got to go to our first NBA game ever, right? And I got to see LeBron James actually play or Steph Curry play or whoever, right? And I was there and I saw him warming up. And like, so now, you know, going to the NBA doesn't seem so far, right? and I'm more
Robert Poirier:
Yeah.
Kenny Joyner:
focused, you know? So that's what we are, man. We just, we wanna make sure that we don't drop the baton when it comes to character, when it comes to etiquette, when it comes to how these young men view themselves.
Robert Poirier:
beautiful. That is beautiful. So funding, you've talked about donations coming in. How do you go about that? How do you is it word of mouth? How do you maybe somebody's listening now and they're like, Whoa, I would, you know, I'd love to give to these guys. I have a, you know, a clothing store, my company makes ties, or I would just love to monetarily send a hundred dollars or whatever. How do they, how do they do that? How do you get funding for this? Cause this isn't cheap. I
Kenny Joyner:
No, it's not.
Robert Poirier:
mean,
Kenny Joyner:
It's not really
Robert Poirier:
it's
Kenny Joyner:
not.
Robert Poirier:
not cheap. I mean, you're, you're donating a lot of your time, which is also money, but for these kids and how do you get that? I mean, you talked about corporations house. How else is it? How do you come about it?
Kenny Joyner:
Well, I'm a firm proponent of, you know, I'll knock on every door. I'll send every email. I'll make every call that I need to make when it comes to funding for these young men. I'll do whatever I need to do because I know that the benefit, you know, will have years and years and years lasting effect. So we do fundraisers. We're doing one now. with another company, Booster, who has really helped us out. And so we'll do a fundraiser, probably two or three a year. There's grant, I write grants, whatever I need to apply for I will. But a lot of it is, you know, just word of mouth. We'll put a lot up on social media, we'll put a lot up on, you know. contact local news, we'll say, hey, this is what we're doing, kind of give us a shout out or whatever the case may be. I'll contact the people in my circle,
Robert Poirier:
Be all right.
Kenny Joyner:
some famous, some not, to be able to say, hey, this is what we're doing. And we just kind of want you to spread the word, that's all. And so, but yeah, a lot of it is just word of mouth and trying to do what we do. And we're obviously, we're trying to funds now to take a trip to DC this summer and obviously that's going to require a lot but you know I just I've never been one to want to deny someone something because of money and so I know it there's resources out here and I'm willing to do whatever I need to do jump through hoops write every grant do what I need to do call whoever I need to call to to get that funding if not I just go on you know I go into my own pocket. at times, you know, and I did that obviously for the first three or four years because, you know, that we just didn't have that kind of traction initially as far as like funding was concerned. But yeah, when the why is strong enough, you'll figure out the how.
Robert Poirier:
Yeah.
Kenny Joyner:
guaranteed, you know, and my this why for me of saving young men's lives, giving them a better future than I had, than I may have myself, you know, giving them possibilities, bringing them hope every single day. That's a strong enough why for me to be able to get into the trenches and do whatever I need to do, you know, to make it happen.
Robert Poirier:
So, and they can find, they can, they can find you at, I think the website is that boyswiththepurposesc.org. Okay,
Kenny Joyner:
Absolutely.
Robert Poirier:
so boyswiththepurposesc for southcarolina.org
Kenny Joyner:
Absolutely.
Robert Poirier:
is the way people can also reach out. And I'm sure there's ways on there. You could probably donate or at least reach out to you as well. I'm sure the. attraction of this. I'm sure there's demand to join your program. Have you thought about expanding this into other markets or what's the plan? Yeah, you have, huh?
Kenny Joyner:
Yes, absolutely. The more, I would say over the past four years specifically, we've gotten we've gotten calls from all around the world, literally.
Robert Poirier:
I'm sure.
Kenny Joyner:
Yeah, to say, hey, and I've got my emails always filled up with, hey, I'd love to talk to you about this. I got a text from somebody today in Texas to duplicate, right, with the
Robert Poirier:
Right.
Kenny Joyner:
program. And so that's what we're working on now. Curriculum for Boys with a Purpose should be ready by August. And so that curriculum will be set. It will be a 36-week curriculum, which will run concurrently with the school year. But we want to make sure that we... I want to make sure that I stay in the after school model, and here's why. Because I get to travel the country and work with teachers and principals and superintendents, I know that we can't put more on teachers. We have to do this in an after school model so that we can again build and help teachers in what they do. Our program is strategically set to where we work directly with teachers and directly with parents. So parents come in, our program, the first thing we say in the consultation is, what would you like us to work on with your son or your nephew or whatever? What would you like to see developed? we don't do in the classroom. We just teach what we teach.
Robert Poirier:
Right, right.
Kenny Joyner:
And then when we work with teachers academically on the academic side, they might say, hey, you know, Mr. Joyner, he is, he's low in his reading, he's low in his math, he's low in his phonetic, phonemic awareness or whatever it might be. And so now specifically, I know what to drill down on and our mentors know what to drill down on when they come to us. So we can better Teachers can't go home with kids and practice their math. They can't go home,
Robert Poirier:
Right.
Kenny Joyner:
but we can practice what's necessary and bridge the gap between what they needed academically in the school and what they do with us. And that's just help. It's just assistance. That's all. But then also, we can develop the character of how you see yourself in this whole thing. Right? How do you see yourself as a math student? How do you see yourself as reading better? How do you see yourself as somebody with respect and integrity? What do those things mean when you actually do the work? That's the whole child. So we
Robert Poirier:
You're
Kenny Joyner:
want to remain.
Robert Poirier:
so intentional on everything. I mean, it seems like with you, so many life lessons just in everything you see, everything you come across. That's
Kenny Joyner:
Yeah,
Robert Poirier:
amazing.
Kenny Joyner:
it has to be, it has to be because... Now, especially now, some of the things I came through last year had a lot of loss in the family. I'm moving differently. I'm moving with a sense of urgency because we
Robert Poirier:
Yeah.
Kenny Joyner:
don't know the time we have left. We don't know how many people we're going to be able to impact. And so I want to move with a sense of urgency while I'm here, while I've got the time, the energy, while my mind is still great. You know,
Robert Poirier:
Ha ha.
Kenny Joyner:
I want to be able to move. again with that sense of urgency to save as many young people. And then hopefully as we go forward, we're going to expand and do girls with a purpose as well.
Robert Poirier:
Really?
Kenny Joyner:
Oh yeah, absolutely. That's not something that I would run, right?
Robert Poirier:
Right.
Kenny Joyner:
I would commission and enlist some great women to be able to do that because there's a need for that. 100%
Robert Poirier:
Oh, absolutely.
Kenny Joyner:
there's a need for that. And so, but we want to do this well first, right? And once we do this well, boom, we're going to tackle that. We're going to tackle that down the road. But yeah, we definitely want to because again, If we just leave it to our young men, that's 50% of the population that we just leaving.
Robert Poirier:
Right.
Kenny Joyner:
You know, we wanna save them as well. So, and with me having a daughter, I know the importance of having a strong male role model in your life and having that father figure or longing for that father figure
Robert Poirier:
Right.
Kenny Joyner:
as a young lady. So yeah, absolutely, we want to do that. And we want to, I want to do mentoring like Apple does phones.
Robert Poirier:
Wow.
Kenny Joyner:
We want to be that good at what we do.
Robert Poirier:
And you will, you will with your with your drive, determination and faith. I have no doubt. You know, I mentioned how these guys are so lucky to have you and it is a, you're changing generations. I mean, the, the, the, the touch that you're having, and I know Steve Harvey, you had said that Steve Hart went in a prior conversation, you know, I brought that up to you and you're like, yeah, that's what Steve Harvey said. And I went back and watched and he did. And. You're not just touching these young men. You're touching them. You're touching their future sons and daughters. You're touching those kids that they come in contact with, as well, just the inspiration, the manners, all of these things. And it's absolutely beautiful, Kenny.
Kenny Joyner:
Thank you man, I appreciate it. 100%.
Robert Poirier:
It really is. And what else? Anything else about the program that I've missed or that you want to hit on?
Kenny Joyner:
Oh man, I just want, you know, like I said, if people want to get in contact with me, they can. I want to help in any way. If people want to bring me in to speak, I also do that as well to be able to speak to young men all over the country. And all they have to do is email me at boyswithapurpose.com and then we can go from there as far as setting that up. But yeah, I just want to have as much impact as I can to save as many lives as I can during the season and just spread that love.
Robert Poirier:
What would you say to a guy that's listening out there like, man, I want to do something. Just don't know. I want to give back. I, you know, I've been through these things. I can feel Kenny, man. I've been there with them. I want to do something. I just don't know how to do it. I don't know how to start. Well, what do you, what do you say to them? What, if you had to sit down, what would you say to them?
Kenny Joyner:
I would say first look at the burden that weighs heavy on your heart. Whatever that burden is, could be young men, could be homelessness, could be whatever, I don't know, right? Look at the burden that's on your heart and then move in that direction. Just do something. We just took one step. Right? That's it. I just took one step and said, hey, I want to do something for these young men. We were meeting 30 minutes during my lunch period just to work on etiquette and manners. That's all. We just took one step. We have no idea that it was going to be seven years later. It was going to be hundreds of people impacted, specifically thousands. We didn't know around the globe people were going to want to know and donate and duplicate the product. We had
Robert Poirier:
You
Kenny Joyner:
no
Robert Poirier:
didn't
Kenny Joyner:
idea.
Robert Poirier:
know you'd be on Steve Harvey's show, did you?
Kenny Joyner:
I had no idea, right? We weren't doing it for that, you know?
Robert Poirier:
Right.
Kenny Joyner:
But the key was we just took the first step. So I would just say, whatever burden is on your heart and whatever area of your life, right? Just take one step, do something in that vein. I got a burden for literacy. We're giving away $1,000 in books to schools all around the country, right? That's on my heart, so I'm just doing it. I'm just calling schools and saying, hey, you got a kid that needs some books? Boom, tell me what books, and I'm sending them. That's it, you know what I'm saying? what you need to do right where you are. You don't, it doesn't have to be this huge thing. We think we've gotta grow or we've gotta do something that's exponential, right?
Robert Poirier:
Right.
Kenny Joyner:
It's the small things, it's in the details, as my wife would say, right? That move the needle, right? 27 years of marriage, how did I get here? One day at a time. One day at a
Robert Poirier:
There
Kenny Joyner:
time.
Robert Poirier:
you go.
Kenny Joyner:
That's it. So you, you, I would say just do what you can, where you are, because that's going to be enough. That's going to be enough. Guaranteed.
Robert Poirier:
Wow. Kenny, you are one amazing human being and I'm so happy that we connected and
Kenny Joyner:
Me as
Robert Poirier:
you
Kenny Joyner:
well.
Robert Poirier:
absolutely have found your purpose. You know, and we are blessed as a society to have you and hopefully there's other men out there too that will stand up and you know that will take that chance. Take that step and go out there and make a difference because we need to.
Kenny Joyner:
Yes, and I'll be happy to help any man that might be struggling, man. I think that that's one of the things that we've got to do as men. We've got to support one another. We've got to help one another because no one man has it all figured out, no matter what they think or say. It's together. It's the support of one another that because I can't lift four tons, but if you give me 10,000 men, we can lift four tons.
Robert Poirier:
There you go.
Kenny Joyner:
And
Robert Poirier:
There
Kenny Joyner:
so
Robert Poirier:
you go.
Kenny Joyner:
that's the biggest piece that, you know, I like to say that our burdens are not as heavy when we lift them together.
Robert Poirier:
That's beautiful. That is beautiful. Kenny, thank you. And I don't want you to be a stranger. I want you to come back and
Kenny Joyner:
anytime.
Robert Poirier:
definitely update us and we'd love to have you on just from time to time and maybe just talk about life, fatherhood and just everything else. So look, thank you so much for your time and I do appreciate it and wish you all the best. And how can everybody find you? Boys with a Purpose, SC. dot org boys with a purpose at gmail.com. Website, not website, but social media.
Kenny Joyner:
Uh,
Robert Poirier:
Tell me those.
Kenny Joyner:
yeah. Well, change maker change underscore maker one, uh, on Instagram change underscore maker 21 on, um, on, uh, tick tock change underscore maker. Uh, one I think on, uh, on Twitter. Um, but yeah, I am the change maker. That's one of the things that, that, that I've been given that name. And because I want to, I want things to be different than when, uh, when I leave them, when they. came here so...
Robert Poirier:
And boys with a purpose, they have Facebook page, does it have a Facebook
Kenny Joyner:
Absolutely.
Robert Poirier:
page or?
Kenny Joyner:
Absolutely. You can check us out on Facebook. We're always posting on Facebook. We're always posting on Instagram. Just either, you know, and something what really now people want more is we've been posting just a little bit of snippets from our lessons, right? Our lessons on content.
Robert Poirier:
Oh yeah.
Kenny Joyner:
Yeah, so you can start to see more of that on Instagram and TikTok because those lessons, again, can inspire young people all around the globe. So we wanna start to do a little bit more in that area as well.
Robert Poirier:
Kenny, brother, thank you. Beautiful work you're doing. And I'm so happy that we got to talk and that you were on and that you agreed to come on. And look, I can't thank you again. I wish you all the best and keep doing what you're doing. We need you. Everybody needs you. So proud of you. Thank you. Okay.
Kenny Joyner:
Thank you. Appreciate it.
Robert Poirier:
Hey guys. And thank you all for listening to Dad Dad's podcast. Again, you can always find us on either Spotify or Apple podcast. as well as on YouTube and Instagram. And be sure to hit the like and subscribe button so you don't miss any episodes. And we will see you all next time. Thank you.